Vulnerability isn’t an effortless thing to master. It’s not necessarily a “practice,” but it’s something you might need to put energy into consciously. That’s especially true if you’re not used to being vulnerable or if you’ve been hurt in the past.
When it comes to showing vulnerability in a relationship, it can be hard to let yourself go. Showing someone you love the deeper side of yourself can be scary.
But it can also improve your intimacy. Furthermore, it can lighten your emotional load. It lets you realize that you don’t have to do everything on your own or shoulder the burden of your emotions.
With that in mind, let’s talk more about being open to vulnerability in your relationship and opening up to your partner.
Vulnerability Will Draw Your Partner In
People often choose not to be vulnerable in relationships because they’re worried it will scare their partner away. That usually isn’t the case. When you show that you’re willing to be vulnerable, you’re also showing your partner that you trust them.
That trust is not only good for your relationship, but you as well. Telling someone about something deep and personal can help you to breathe easier. Otherwise, it can feel like you’re keeping part of yourself hidden from your partner.
When you do open up, it’s normal to feel a little lighter and freer. Doing so can also encourage your partner to be more open, as well. When you both choose to be vulnerable, you can foster more intimacy. Your relationship can end up stronger than ever just because you are willing to share more of true self.
You Know You’re Not Alone
Carrying heavy emotions all on your own can be overwhelming. It can lead to excessive stress, anxiety, or even depression. Plus, all of these mental health conditions can lead to detrimental medical issues, too.
When you open up to your partner, you’ll have a built-in support system. You can realize that you don’t have to handle your emotions alone. That can reduce feelings of anxiety and make you more hopeful.
How to Be More Vulnerable in Your Relationship
If you’re not sure how to open up to your partner and show more vulnerability, there are a few helpful things that can get you started, including:
- Slowing down and keeping yourself in the present moment
- Acknowledging and accepting your feelings
- Asking for what you need when you need it
- Saying what you honestly think
That last tip is, perhaps, the most essential. Far too often, people choose not to be vulnerable because they are worried about the outcome. By being mindful of the moment, you can ease those worries.
If those “what if” thoughts start to plague you, focus on your breathing and surroundings instead. Let those thoughts go like clouds passing by that cannot be pinned down.
Letting Your Partner In for a Lasting Relationship
Vulnerability builds intimacy. Intimacy builds lasting, healthy relationships. When you are willing to show your partner the vulnerable side of yourself, you build that intimacy by being honest.
In doing so, your relationship will become stronger, and you can have confidence in knowing you have a partner who will help you deal with your emotions no matter what.
Remember, vulnerability isn’t easy. But, when you finally break down your walls, you can find that your relationship will be better for it. And, you can feel more at ease with your emotions and feelings.
If you have a hard time showing vulnerability in your relationship, contact a Crossroad’s therapist to set up an appointment. We can talk more about tips and strategies to open up and share more of yourself. Many of our therapists work from at attachment theory perspective and can help you understand how your attachment style impacts your relationships. To learn more about attachment styles click here.
If you notice within yourself a challenge to let others into your vulnerability and to connect vulnerably with others please reach out to one of our counselors. We offer a complementary 20-minute phone consultation. Our locations are located throughout the valley with counseling centers located in Phoenix, Anthem, Biltmore/Arcadia, Paradise Valley, and Scottsdale. Call us at 623-680-3486,text 623-688-5115, or email firstname.lastname@example.org.