How to Find Common Ground and Real Connection in Your Relationship

When it comes to relationships, it’s crucial to build a real, long-lasting connection. While we may seek a connection, it’s not always easy to find or maintain it.

A real connection requires mutual respect and trust, which may take time to develop. By finding common ground with your partner, you can help build and maintain a deep, loving connection — let’s look at some ways you can allow this to happen.

Be Honest and Straightforward About Your Needs

When we enter a new relationship, we tend to go into it with varying expectations. You know what you want in a partner, and you should be straightforward about it. Many of us shy away from expressing what we need in a relationship out of fear.

However, you deserve to have a partner who understands your wants and needs. Conversely, they deserve the same out of you. Some people just aren’t right for each other — but you’ll never know unless you take an honest approach in your relationship.

By being honest about your needs, you’ll also help establish a stronger connection in your relationship. If your partner isn’t able or is unwilling to meet your needs, they may not be the right person for you.

If they are, however, then they are showing that they care about and respect you. When there is genuine concern and respect in a relationship, there is a stronger connection, too.

Appreciate One Another’s Hobbies and Interests

You likely have many things in common with your partner. Maybe you have the same sense of humor, enjoy the same shows, or listen to the same music. While commonalities help us bond in a relationship, it’s also safe to assume that you have some differences.

For example, many couples have different hobbies and interests. You may enjoy gardening, whereas your partner doesn’t care for it. Maybe your partner enjoys cooking, but you steer clear of the kitchen.

Even if you don’t quite understand the appeal of your partner’s hobbies or interests, you should respect and appreciate them nonetheless. Our hobbies say a lot about who we are, and we gravitate towards them because they are fulfilling and enjoyable.

By showing your partner that you appreciate their interests, you’ll help establish common ground and build a stronger connection. You don’t have to love everything that your partner loves — but you should encourage them to love it.

Allow Yourself to Be Vulnerable

The ability to be vulnerable is a crucial part of any relationship. While many people understand this, they still find it hard to accomplish it in their relationship. There are many reasons people are scared to be vulnerable, and it is often out of fear of being hurt or rejected.

By allowing yourself to be vulnerable, you’re helping establish a connection in your relationship. We can’t possibly establish a true, deep connection with every person that we meet. You can expect to find one in your relationship, but you have to let your walls down.

Open up, be vulnerable, and encourage your partner to do the same. As time goes on, you two will develop a deep and intimate bond.

Let Go of Judgment and Give People a Fair Chance

As we grow and experience different relationships, we tend to become a little close-minded about new potential partners. You may immediately write someone off because they don’t share the same views or like the same things that you do. While it’s normal to form preferences when dating, it’s also important to give people a fair chance and keep an open mind.

It’s nearly impossible to stop judging other people. And it’s not always bad to make judgments — sometimes, our intuition helps us dodge bad situations. If you want to find a connection with someone, however, you have to give them a fair chance.

Try to make your relationship as judgment-free as possible — when you do, you are setting yourself up for success in establishing a real, long-lasting connection!

Begin Working With A Relationship Therapist in Phoenix Scottsdale, and Online in AZ

Our team of relationship therapists offers a 20-minute complimentary phone call.  You can ask all the questions you have and see if counseling at our PhoenixAnthem, Scottsdale.and online in Arizona is the right fit for you. To start your therapy journey, please follow these simple steps:

  1. Contact Crossroads Counseling for a complimentary 20-minute phone consult
  2. Meet with a relationship therapist
  3. Start receiving the support your relationship deserves

Feel free to call contact us at by calling 623-680-3486, texting 623-688-5115, or emailing